The New Year has officially arrived, which means so has the desire to revamp eating habits. And it seems everyone is going keto.
The ketogenic diet, aka keto, is a low-carb eating plan that aims to propel the body into a state of ketosis (basically when your body burns fat for energy). According to doctors and nutritionists, the keto diet has pros and cons, so it’s best to do your research and chat with your physician before diving in.
The keto life calls for lots of fat and protein, and very little sugar and carbohydrates. This means foods like cheese, avocados, meat (including seafood), nuts and eggs are acceptable. Fruits, grains, root vegetables and added sugar are off-limits.
Needless to say, going keto can be a challenge, as well as a source of humor. And, like other trendy eating plans, the keto diet has become the subject of jokes from the funny folks of the Twitter-verse.
We’ve rounded up 33 humorous tweets about the keto diet from those in pursuit of ketosis and those observing the fad from afar. Read them below and be prepared to laugh:
Me on keto- “wow I love my life, I’m so happy.”
Also me on keto when someone says the word donut- “I WILL MURDER YOU THEN SET YOU ON FIRE. NEVER TALK TO ME AGAIN.”
— Amanda Janette (@AlaskanAmber95) December 13, 2018
They say humans never make any progress but just think, it only took 40 years but we managed to change the name of the Atkins diet to the “Keto diet.” Let’s see, what else..
— Lurkin’ Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) August 6, 2018
Keto is all about keeping everyone around you updated on what you’re eating
— dylan (@dyllidylli) December 12, 2018
I was just thinking about a girl who once messaged me after I posted a pic of waffle on Insta saying it was insensitive since I knew she was doing keto
— Danielle Separtridge in a pear tree (@ellesep) December 14, 2018
I have no problem sticking to the Keto diet. I just modify it a bit by putting my cheese and avocado in between two fat pieces of French bread. Super easy!
— Stacey (@skittle624) September 19, 2018
Jesus is so ripped cause he only eats communion wafers (Keto Diet)
— Jennifer McAuliffe (@JenniferJokes) August 13, 2018
[5 years after faking his death]
Me: I’m alive!
Family: *Screaming & crying* Why would you do this to us?
Me: I wanted to teach you all a lesson in honesty and you guys ate cheesecake in front of me when you know I’m really trying hard at this keto diet.
— James Alvarez (@ObscureGent) April 14, 2018
one taught me love. one taught me nothing. one taught me what the keto diet was
— JuanPa (@jpbrammer) December 1, 2018
I wanna love something as much as people love talking about their keto diets.
— Lindsey Pelas (@LindseyPelas) October 31, 2018
Day 10 Keto: My kink is now quest bars.
— Tanya Holly Jolly Christmas (@twtfarts) October 9, 2017
Some things that are statistically hard NOT to talk about once you start doing them:
• Burning Man
• Silent meditation 🤔
— Vlad Magdalin (@callmevlad) December 17, 2018
Starting a Keto diet today so that’s probably all you’ll hear me talk about until I inevitably fail miserably
— Dean Michael Unglert (@deanie_babies) October 1, 2018
I’ve been eating keto for a day why haven’t I lost 10 pounds
— Emily Ballmaier (@EmBallmaier) October 10, 2017
Is crying because you have to empty the dishwasher a common side effect of going Keto?
— Housy Wife (@wife_housy) June 18, 2018
Theoretically speaking… You fall in love. Get married. Have kids. For 10 years, you’re blissfully happy. Then your spouse comes home and tells you he’s going on the keto diet. What do you do?
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) September 28, 2018
Something I have learned is that one of the byproducts of ketosis is acetone, and that therefore being on the keto diet makes your breath smell like nail-polish remover.
— Lauren O’Neal (@laureneoneal) September 11, 2018
I ate Oreos and nachos for dinner but, sure, I’d love to hear about your Keto diet
— Ramblin Mama (@ramblinma) August 13, 2018
Keto shopping list:
– Cream cheese
– More butter
– Coconut flour
– More cheese
– Even more butter
– All the cheese
in the store
— Toni Hammer (@realtonihammer) February 10, 2018
Me: is on keto, doesn’t eat gluten or sugary stuff
Also me: obsessed with cake and cookie decorating videos
— Kel/Kelly 🔜 PAX South (@GlitterBroker) September 28, 2018
Everyone’s suddenly raving online about their keto diet, the 50 best keto recipes, & getting results fast by with keto eating.
Me: ….”kee-toe? …ket-toe?”
— Stephanie Ortiz (@Six_Pack_Mom) April 27, 2018
Christmas: where three months of Keto gets destroyed in three days.
— elιαѕ тoυғeхιѕ (@EliasToufexis) December 24, 2018
I’ve switched to a mostly keto diet. 60% meat and fat. 30% desserts. 10% miscellaneous.
— Joseph Mallozzi (@BaronDestructo) December 27, 2018
I can barely stop eating long enough to paint my fingernails but sure tell me about Keto I’m listening
— m🤶🏻mma unfiltered (@MommaUnfiltered) September 30, 2018
Just ate a keto sloppy joe for dinner on Halloween. No dessert.
I guess this is what hell feels like.
— Jordynne Grace (@JordynneGrace) October 31, 2018
Colleague: Are you on keto?
Me: Sure, but I think it’s pronounced Cheetos.
— Sana (@PastMuster) December 4, 2018
[me, eating 3 lbs of bacon]: It’s ok guys it’s on the Keto diet
Also me: oh look cotton candy!
— Mandy (@MandyPandy007) November 7, 2018
“You’ve lost weight- you look great! Keto?”
Nope, that would be the illness I’m still getting over, but thanks Los Angeles!
— Zelda Williams (@zeldawilliams) October 21, 2018
Being hungry in an airport while on keto: oh cool I can have almonds 😂😂
— Katy (@lustrelux) June 26, 2018
Keto cheat day. Waiting for pizza, drunk tweeting (had beer already). Disregard the next 2 hrs please.
— Andreas M. Antonopoulos (@aantonop) December 13, 2018
Day 20 of Keto.
If I die, bury me with a cookie in my mouth.#keto
— Terry Maggert (@TerryMaggert) June 14, 2018
Looked into keto diet but it looked way too complex. So I’m sitting here eating dumplings.
— Kim Chi (@KimChi_Chic) August 25, 2017